Love where you live.
The number of emails and messages I get from people telling me how much they are over New York is staggering. Like, it would blow your mind. What I find crazy about it is, when we were thinking about leaving and I was on my digital hunt for people who had escaped before us, my searches turned up nothing. Nada. I literally felt like Vasco da Gama, exploring uncharted territory I didn’t know how to navigate.
The stories these strangers share with me are inspiring. Sad. Optimistic. Refreshing. Rooted in common sense. They’re from people who’ve lived in New York their entire lives and are finally realizing they’re sick and tired of the struggle. People who have just had their first kid, and are realizing just how damn expensive and difficult it can be. People who are tired of the harsh winters. The expense. The commute. The competition. The taxes. The grime. (Do I need to go on?)
I try to dole out advice, always stamped with a caveat that everyone’s experience and journey is different. I can share my journey in escaping New York for North Carolina, and share the good, the bad, and the ugly, but I can’t help anyone make a decision like this for themselves. It’s way too major. What I hope I can help do, though, is offer an ear and a peek into our journey, and how it’s working for us. Sharing is caring, y’all.
Ultimately, what leaving New York taught me is, you ought to love where you live. We all should. As far as I’m concerned, it’s not just about the kind of person you are in life, but how happy your surroundings make you. Life is too short to stay somewhere you hate just because that’s where your parents chose to live their lives, or because it sounds too complicated to uproot yourself and start over. All that’s going to do is fill you with regret and make you bitter and annoyed. I didn’t realize just how bitter and annoyed I was toward New York until I escaped it.
So what do I love right now about where I live?
- The mild winters. I love that I can be outside riding bikes with my kiddos in February. I see my friends’ updates about snow and ice, and I love you but you can keep it thankyouverymuch.
- The cleanliness. People here don’t litter. The streets in Cary are spotless. Maybe there’s a litter robot that comes and cleans the roads? I don’t know, but whatever it is, there’s something nice about living, working and raising kids in a place like this.
- My house. This Craftsman house, with it’s deep front porch and wide plank, honed floors just makes me happy. This house just feels like love and warmth to me, and unlike my house in NY where I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop and it’s ALWAYS an expensive shoe (my NY plumber must have been making six figures), this one is reliable and new.
- My commute. My kids go to a daycare/pre-k that’s walking distance from my house, and my commute to work is less than 10 minutes by car. No more trains, subways, traffic jams, fighting for parking… just the way it ought to be: I leave my house, I drive, and ten minutes later I’m sitting at my desk.
- The food. It’s really all about the food, right? And there’s so much great food here. But unlike New York where you can be overwhelmed by the options, here it’s a manageable food scene you can navigate easily. I dig it.
So there you have it. Now, it’s not always roses, and the grass is not always greener. That’s for sure. But I’m proud of our family’s decision to take a chance, face our fears, and find a place to live that we love. It was worth it, for us.
Don’t stop sending your letters, questions or inquiries. I love hearing from you!
